Since drug companies are increasingly creating new, fictitious diseases to increase their pharmaceutical sales, such as General Anxiety Disorder (GAD), Mike Adams decided to pitch in and help them out with this humorous article that classifies normal human behaviors as diseases, including:
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Refrigerator Door Disease (RDD) -- standing in front of the refrigerator with the door wide open, staring blankly
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Language Obfuscation Disorder (LOD) -- strikes mostly doctors, and causes its victims to speak in unintelligible medi-babble
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Obsessive Hosiery Dislocation Disorder (OHDD) -- a frantic household search for the other sock of any given sock pair
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Commerce Anxiety Disorder (CAD) -- heightened worry over whether your credit card will be declined at the cash register
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Repetitive Remote Disorder (RDD) -- rapid channel surfing of cable television using a remote control device
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Obsessive Wardrobe Change Disorder (OWCD) -- incessant changing of clothing before a planned event
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Obsessive Disobedience Disorder (ODD) -- a persistent distrust of schoolteachers, government officials, law enforcement figures, and other authority figures (A "real" disorder currently being discussed by those in the psychiatric community!)
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Repetitive Pocket Searching Syndrome (RPSS) -- repeated searching of one's own pockets following the misplacement of some small item
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Ultraviolet Light Tanning Dependent (UVLTD) -- drives victims to repeatedly sunbathe (another "real" disease according to some in organized medicine!)
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Traffic Light Anticipation Disorder (TLAD) -- those who think red lights indicate the driver should allow their vehicle to slowly creep forward into the intersection, sort of like a green light, but in slow motion
