Dr. Mercola November 17 2007 27,065 views
Do you find yourself running ragged every day, yet keep saying yes to new commitments? You’re not alone. It’s such a common phenomena that two business-school professors published a study explaining the psychology that keeps you trapped in constant state of being overbooked.
The reason why you overcommit, say Gal Zauberman, PhD., and John Lynch Jr., PhD., is because you make faulty assumptions about the future, expecting to have more time in the future than you have today. But, when next week turns into today, you discover that you’re still too busy to deliver everything you promised.
The authors suspect that the nature of time fools you, and you “forget” how the little things keep filling up your days. Essentially, you believe that the future is perfect: your pantry is stocked, traffic runs smoothly, there’s no need to wait in lines, and other people are on time. Today, however, “things happen.”
According to Zauberman and Lynch, “People are consistently surprised to be so busy today. Lacking knowledge of what specific tasks will compete for their time in the future, they act as if new demands will not inevitably arise that are as pressing as those faced today.”
As a fact of life, there are only so many hours in a given day, and usually it takes most of them just to get your major tasks accomplished, and, often, the things that really matter get left for “some other day.”
That time-starved feeling many of you have, me included, is the reason I‘m fond of sharing time-management tips that might save you a few minutes every day to pursue your true passion, exercise, cook dinner from scratch, or whatever it may be that would add value and joy to your life.
Here are just a few tips you can use on the job, with co-workers and at home to save time for the stuff that matters.
I’m also a major fan of Tim Ferriss’ book, The 4-Hour Work Week, which explains how you CAN work less and achieve more, while passionately pursuing your true interests.
It is very Japanese to be unable to say no. I have to be very careful what I ask my husband to do, because he will stress himself out trying to do it, no matter how unreasonable! I, on the other hand, am very American in this regard. I put my foot down, and everyone knows where the line is drawn. It really makes things a lot easier, and the people you turn down make other arrangements.
"I think part of the reason is that it is difficult to say no when asked to do something.
Mary, I would add that it is difficult to say no when the request is a worthy cause. It's like saying that you don't support that cause, when what you really mean is "I support your cause, but I have other worthwhile commitments that I must honor before taking on any more." I think for many of us it is difficult to accept that we can't solve the world's problems no matter how much we do!
Sometimes I have found I have over-commited when I needed to feel that I was needed. That I have "to be there for everyone". This in the past has been because of my need to feel that I was important to others and I had to be a people pleaser in order for others to like me or that I may feel accepted by others.
It's a controlling factor in some ways. " I'll do for you if you like me and let me be your friend." Of course, that was in the past. Now God has helped me to understand that the only one I have to be concerned about pleasing is Him and not others. I love to help others and of course want to know I am of some worth to others but there's no bondage about it anymore because I have only to ask Him in prayer who He wants me to help and I can be certain He will show me without it causing me to be burned out.