How timely this article is!  I have had to make some significant decisions regarding my aging parents over the past two weeks, and how I approached them worked for me.

While wading knee deep in sibling power struggles with opinions that came from anger and fear, it seemed as though the only way to deal with the difficult conversations that must occur when one's parent's are aging I found, is that you simply must maintain a non-fear, non-anger based perspective.

The minute you go to a place of fear and anger, you will definitely make the wrong decision.

Gut-feelings are definitely something not to be ignored. If I had know that earlier in life, I could have avoided a whole lot of grief!

Having said that it is also not only prudent, but wise to plan as best as you can. There is nothing like being smacked in the face with a crisis and having no contingency plan.  The contingency plan can be as simple as a calm thought and awareness of a bigger picture outcome, or it can be as elaborate as a well thought out document that outlines details.

The interesting thing is that now that I am more aware of the anger and fear based approach that often creeps into decisions, the more I choose not to go there.  It's a good thing to have conversations with yourself....!
And if you prefer, find a trusted friend to hash things out with.
It's cheaper than therapy!!

I didn't see prayer mentioned. All are good ways to arrive at an answer, but prayer should be in there too!!!!!

I learned a fabulous way to make decisions that involve thinking and asking why and lookng at consequences and mulling the problem over in all directions.  Then, you frame a very clear question you want answered that exactly states what you want to figure out.  Then burn this into your brain over a few minutes and let it GO.  Let the subconsious with its full deck of cards turn it over and almost invariably within three days the answer pops up at you in a moment of brain-idling and you suddenly Know.

I find it funny that it's always three days.  But the trick is not to distract the subconsious from its work by re-thinking and stewing.  Get the editor out of there.  Permssion to take a break from it, with ease, as you know it's already in better hands, the hands of your own subconsious that knows more about it the 'you' do.

I had a friend who asked this question about where she should live, given her clients, her horses that needed to be boarded, traffic etc and got a superb answer.  But her daugther threw a fit because it was a horrible choice for her and away from her friends.  The mother had forgotten to include the child in the question. it wasn't 'where is the best place for ME to live' but should have been 'best place for US to live'.  Three days later she got another equally amazing and more suitable answer.  

The question has got to be right and you've got to leave it alone. Then trust it; it will come with a sense of rightness.  If the problem is tricky and it seems to be unpalatable but probably truly the best you can do, then believe it.

Best of both worlds, thinking gathering mind and the "Brewmaster", the subconsious.

The 5WHYS is a common quality tool we use for root cause analysis & often used with a fishbone (Ishakawa) diagram.

Are you getting the wrong answers? Try asking the right questions...

Hmm, I have a difficult time with big decisions and have had to make
several in recent years and will have another major one to make in the
upcoming year.  But one thing I find is that there's no way to
anticipate which is the "right" decision...in fact, I think most
decisions that people make regarding say, jobs, and big moves, and so
on, are the "right" ones because humans are quite good at adjusting to
their conditions and making their decisions work.  As a Cognitive
Experimental Psychologist, I know from my research and that of my
colleagues that people do show some paradoxical decision-making
behaviors, but generally they make choices that maximize their benefits
and minimize the costs. In addition, people are also very good at
justifying/explaining their decisions later, even if not optimal.