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How to Make the Right Decision in Any Situation

decision making, choices, questions, instinct, intuitionWhich job should you take? What car should you buy? Are you ready for another baby?

Life is full of tough choices, and the bigger they are, the harder they get.

Research shows that most people will not choose at all when presented with several good options. But practice, experience, and rules of thumbs can help you to make those decisions. Here’s how:

Analyze Outcomes

When making a choice, then, it pays to take some time to consider the outcome you expect. Ask yourself the following questions:

  • What is the probable outcome of this choice?
  • What outcomes are highly unlikely?
  • What are the likely outcomes of not choosing this one?
  • What would be the outcome of doing the exact opposite?

Thinking in terms of long-term outcomes can help you find clarity and direction.

Ask Why Five Times

For instance:

  1. Why should I take this job? It pays well and offers me a chance to grow.
  2. Why is that important? Because I want to build a career and not just have a string of meaningless jobs.
  3. Why? Because I want my life to have meaning.
  4. Why? So I can be happy.
  5. Why? Because that’s what’s important in life.

Follow Your Instincts

People who make decisions quickly, even when lacking information, tend to be more satisfied with their decisions than people who research and carefully weigh their options. Your unconscious is very good at working through complex problems. People who “go with their gut” are actually trusting the work their unconscious mind has already done.


Sources:

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Comment on This Article Community Comments (24)
 
 
Posted On Jul 11, 2008
How timely this article is!  I have had to make some significant decisions regarding my aging parents over the past two weeks, and how I approached them worked for me.

While wading knee deep in sibling power struggles with opinions that came from anger and fear, it seemed as though the only way to deal with the difficult conversations that must occur when one's parent's are aging I found, is that you simply must maintain a non-fear, non-anger based perspective.

The minute you go to a place of fear and anger, you will definitely make the wrong decision.

Gut-feelings are definitely something not to be ignored. If I had know that earlier in life, I could have avoided a whole lot of grief!

Having said that it is also not only prudent, but wise to plan as best as you can. There is nothing like being smacked in the face with a crisis and having no contingency plan.  The contingency plan can be as simple as a calm thought and awareness of a bigger picture outcome, or it can be as elaborate as a well thought out document that outlines details.

The interesting thing is that now that I am more aware of the anger and fear based approach that often creeps into decisions, the more I choose not to go there.  It's a good thing to have conversations with yourself....!
And if you prefer, find a trusted friend to hash things out with.
It's cheaper than therapy!!


 
Miss Bliss
Savvy User Savvy User, Joined On 3/2008
Miss Bliss  
Replied

seg
Savvy User Savvy User Joined On 11/2006
seg  
 
Posted On Jul 14, 2008
Nicely stated Samsara...Judging from your post i'd say you got all the ammo required to tackle any future complex decision making situations....

On Garg Craig's website a while ago i had read on using EFT insights to help in these decision making situations, basically when you're tapping you asking for "insights" on how to tackle these situations.....It worked for me a few times at least, so i was really greatful.....Scientist George i believe was the guy who came up with it, really cool....


Miss Bliss
Savvy User Savvy User Joined On 3/2008
Miss Bliss  
 
Posted On Jul 14, 2008
Thanks seg, I am trying!   I liked qualitygeek's link also since it helps to really understand how to break things down.  Sometimes I am blocked and I don't realize it until I have someone ask me some pointed questions...(my mind tends to want to avoid). 

But I have found EFT to be successful especially when I use it with my Neuronetwork chiropractic...It's like my gateways open even more and I am releasing stuff like gangbusters! Neat stuff!  What is your opinion on Neuronetwork chiro?


Miss Bliss
Savvy User Savvy User Joined On 3/2008
Miss Bliss  
 
Posted On Jul 19, 2008
seg, no, you are not going crazy...! I have evolved into a new name...
from samsara to sweet moksha bliss....!!





Reesacat
Savvy User Savvy User Joined On 1/2007
Reesacat  
 
Posted On Jul 19, 2008
Love the new name, Sweet Moksha Bliss!

 
 
 
Posted On Jul 14, 2008
I didn't see prayer mentioned. All are good ways to arrive at an answer, but prayer should be in there too!!!!!

 
Arizona
Savvy User Savvy User, Joined On 6/2007
Arizona  
 
 
 
Posted On Jul 11, 2008
The 5WHYS is a common quality tool we use for root cause analysis & often used with a fishbone (Ishakawa) diagram.

Are you getting the wrong answers? Try asking the right questions...

 
qualitygeek
Savvy User Savvy User, Joined On 10/2007
qualitygeek  
Replied

Miss Bliss
Savvy User Savvy User Joined On 3/2008
Miss Bliss  
 
Posted On Jul 11, 2008
Thanks for the link qualitygeek.  I try to use this also in EFT to try to get to my root causes, but I am a novice and  I need a lot of practice and sometimes an experienced practitioner to help me dig deeper. 
Once that 'onion is peeled' so to speak, I am able to bring down the intensity of the feeling attached to an event and often achieve good results!

 My goal is to be more consistent and to become more adept to deal with the real acute stuff...



 
 
 
Posted On Jul 29, 2008

I learned a fabulous way to make decisions that involve thinking and asking why and lookng at consequences and mulling the problem over in all directions.  Then, you frame a very clear question you want answered that exactly states what you want to figure out.  Then burn this into your brain over a few minutes and let it GO.  Let the subconsious with its full deck of cards turn it over and almost invariably within three days the answer pops up at you in a moment of brain-idling and you suddenly Know.

I find it funny that it's always three days.  But the trick is not to distract the subconsious from its work by re-thinking and stewing.  Get the editor out of there.  Permssion to take a break from it, with ease, as you know it's already in better hands, the hands of your own subconsious that knows more about it the 'you' do.

I had a friend who asked this question about where she should live, given her clients, her horses that needed to be boarded, traffic etc and got a superb answer.  But her daugther threw a fit because it was a horrible choice for her and away from her friends.  The mother had forgotten to include the child in the question. it wasn't 'where is the best place for ME to live' but should have been 'best place for US to live'.  Three days later she got another equally amazing and more suitable answer.  

The question has got to be right and you've got to leave it alone. Then trust it; it will come with a sense of rightness.  If the problem is tricky and it seems to be unpalatable but probably truly the best you can do, then believe it.

Best of both worlds, thinking gathering mind and the "Brewmaster", the subconsious.


 
alphafem2002
Novice User Novice User, Joined On 12/2006
alphafem2002  
 
 
 
Posted On Jul 11, 2008
Hmm, I have a difficult time with big decisions and have had to make
several in recent years and will have another major one to make in the
upcoming year.  But one thing I find is that there's no way to
anticipate which is the "right" decision...in fact, I think most
decisions that people make regarding say, jobs, and big moves, and so
on, are the "right" ones because humans are quite good at adjusting to
their conditions and making their decisions work.  As a Cognitive
Experimental Psychologist, I know from my research and that of my
colleagues that people do show some paradoxical decision-making
behaviors, but generally they make choices that maximize their benefits
and minimize the costs. In addition, people are also very good at
justifying/explaining their decisions later, even if not optimal.

 
CSR
Apprentice User Apprentice User, Joined On 8/2007
CSR  
Replied

BeeGirl
Savvy User Savvy User Joined On 4/2008
BeeGirl  
 
Posted On Jul 11, 2008
What??? My uncanny powers of intuition are actually nothing more than an exceptional ability to rationalize? Oh well, I’m sure that’s for the best. : )
But seriously, I disagree. My gut beats my brain nine times out of ten, as far as best possible outcomes go. There’s been many a time I wished I’d followed it instead.



CSR
Apprentice User Apprentice User Joined On 8/2007
CSR  
 
Posted On Jul 11, 2008
Many of the types of decisions I study are not socially-related...so they are sort of "gut" decisions. The main finding we observe is that the greater the amount of information one has, the better their chance of making the optimizing decision.  With more socially-related decisions, we typically don't have much information in the grand scheme of things...


BeeGirl
Savvy User Savvy User Joined On 4/2008
BeeGirl  
 
Posted On Jul 11, 2008
I'm not sure I'm understanding you correctly. I suppose the faith I have in my own ability to handle any negative consequences that arise from my major (uninformed, non-social) decisions could be interpreted as rationalization, but I have yet to experience any - which leads me to believe that I either have a bit of intuition or an incredibly positive outlook. :-)




stoic
Apprentice User Apprentice User Joined On 3/2007
stoic  
 
Posted On Jul 11, 2008
Hey. I thought we already covered this, Pisces....


BeeGirl
Savvy User Savvy User Joined On 4/2008
BeeGirl  
 
Posted On Jul 11, 2008
Stoic,
You are decidedly right :-P


stoic
Apprentice User Apprentice User Joined On 3/2007
stoic  
 
Posted On Jul 11, 2008
I could actually use some clarification, too, CSR.

Would trading/speculating the markets fall into the "not socially related" category? You are probably aware of what the behavioral economist/ neuroeconomist folks have to say about the generally poor quality of decisions in that realm. And this is also a realm where its easy to get caught up in info overload. Just wondering.


CSR
Apprentice User Apprentice User Joined On 8/2007
CSR  
 
Posted On Jul 14, 2008
Well, stoic, the people in my lab are studying "behavioral economics" as you called it and are finding some differences to the classic findings of, for e.g. Kahneman and Tyversky.  The decisions that those previous studies used were often highly abstract and not the types we encounter in the real world setting.  So, the people here have attempted to frame the decisions more like real world decisions, including those that require people to actually act on the world, where the costs and/or benefits are explicit, and people then seem to behavior far more optimally than originally reported.


CSR
Apprentice User Apprentice User Joined On 8/2007
CSR  
 
Posted On Jul 14, 2008
I bet you have both, BeeGirl!  :-)  There are definite differences between positive and negative "outlooks" or what I would label how conservative people are in their decisions.  "Intuition" I'd argue, is represented by what researchers call "priors"...which are supposed to be essentially your "default" internal state before you've obtained more information from the world to make your decision.


BeeGirl
Savvy User Savvy User Joined On 4/2008
BeeGirl  
 
Posted On Jul 14, 2008
Just to muddy the waters a little - where, if at all, does instinct fit into this equation?
I generally make my major decisions (gut) on the spur of the moment with very little information. My minor decisions however, frequently suffer from information overload.
Maybe it's a flaw in my thought process, lol.


stoic
Apprentice User Apprentice User Joined On 3/2007
stoic  
 
Posted On Jul 14, 2008
CSR...I haven't even gotten around to reading any of the Kahneman/Tversky output - just articles. extracts - & they are already considered "classical", lol, I can't keep up!

The lonnnng list of biases they delineated did & still seems descriptive, if not explanatory, of why the vast majority of speculators (90-95%), lose - & by extension, why financial decision-making generally, is so poor.

 
 
 
 
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