The groundbreaking study, scheduled to be published in the May issue of the International Journal of Biology, shows an impressive 85 percent success rate using this refreshingly low-tech solution to a common, growing problem.
“The technique appears to be equally effective in both men and women, regardless of their current level of hair loss,” said April Meade in a press conference on March 31. Several hair restoration companies have already expressed interest.
Drs. Poisson D’Avril and Michelo B. DaBeers expressed their optimism in a separate press release: “This discovery is so remarkably simple, it’s really like finding out the glasses you lost were on the top of your head the whole time. This could very well revolutionize the lives of thousands of men and women who suffer from mild to severe hair loss.”
The remarkable effectiveness of this technique is perhaps mirrored in the comments from one of the study’s volunteers, Adam Folle: “It’s amazing. I had a large bald spot on the top of my head two weeks ago, and just rubbing this on my head once a day made my natural hair grow back. I’m ecstatic, and I’m sure my fiancée will change her mind and return, now that the smell is dissipating.”
Researchers are still trying to figure out why omega-3 supplement capsules or liquid fish oil doesn’t work when applied in a similar fashion. “It is puzzling,” said Dr. D’Avril, “but so far the only application technique found effective is to rub the interior of fresh fish on your head directly. Some patients do find the odor hard to deal with. However, the rate at which it stimulates re-growth tends to make up for its temporary disadvantages.”
Did you forget what day it is today?
Well, if you fell for that one, I’m running a special on a bucket full-o-fish as well!
Ever Wondered Where April Fool’s Day Comes From?
The origin of April Fool’s Day remains a mystery. No one really knows where, when or why a day of foolishness became a celebrated yearly event.
There are clues, however. References to an “All Fool’s Day” began to appear in Europe during the late Middle Ages. It was essentially a folk celebration that the elite did not participate in. Potential predecessors of the day can also be found in some of the festivals celebrated throughout antiquity, which included trickery and tomfoolery.
One such tradition includes the Satumalia, a Roman winter festival, observed at the end of December. It involved drinking, dancing, gift exchanges, and slaves were allowed to pretend they ruled their masters for the day. Out of this celebration rose the Festus Fatuorum (The Feast of Fools), which involved the election of a mock pope and parodied church rituals.
Northern Europeans also observed an ancient festival, honoring the Celtic god of humor called Lud. But perhaps the most intriguing suggestion is the British folklore surrounding the town of Gotham, the legendary “town of fools” in Nottinghamshire.
According to folklore, any road the King set foot upon became his property. When the folks of Gotham found out that King John was planning to travel through the town, they refused to let the King in. When the troops King John sent to the town arrived, they found the town overrun by apparent lunatics, engaged in loony activities like drowning fish, and catching birds in roofless cages. It was all an act, but the King fell for it and declared the townsfolk too crazy to be punished for their insubordination. Since then, according to some, April Fool’s Day is perpetuated to commemorate their brilliant trickery.
But whatever the origin might be, April Fool’s Day is now a firmly established day of tomfoolery, across much of the world.
Google has become famous for creating some rather interesting, and funny, pranks each year. I can’t wait to see what they do today, but here’s a sample of their previous internet hoaxes:
- 2000 – the MentalPlex, a Mental Visualization Internet Search Tool
- 2002 – PigeonRank, the heart of Google’s search technology
- 2004 – Google’s lunar hosting and research center Copernicus Center Now Hiring
- 2005 -- Google Gulp! Quench your thirst for knowledge
- 2006 – Google Romance and SoulMate Search